Youth Gone Wild

Since I was born they couldn't hold me down
Another misfit kid, another burned-out town

Never played by the rules I never really cared
My nasty reputation takes me everywhere

I look and see it's not only me
So many others have stood where I stand
We are the young so raise your hands

They call us problem child
We spend our lives on trial
We walk an endless mile
We are the youth gone wild
We stand and we won't fall
We're the one and one for all
The writing's on the wall
We are the youth gone wild

                                  "Youth Gone Wild"

                                  Skid Row

                                  1989

 

 

Ah, the 80s.  Back when music was good (in my opinion, anyway).  It was the 80s that gave us Madonna, Cyndi Lauper, Billy Idol, and the epic stardom of Michael Jackson.  We rocked out to bands like Bon Jovi, Guns N Roses, Van Halen and the notorious Queen.  The 80s is when MTV made its debut and played nothing but music videos.  I remember hearing one of their original VJs say sometime in the mid-90s, "I won't let my kids watch MTV."  I don't blame him.

 

I also remember the 80s as being the time when charismatic Christians blamed rock and roll music for lewd and crude behavior in teenagers.  When Ozzy Osbourne bit the head off a bat at a concert in 1978, all of a suddent the church was in an uproar.  Heavy metal bands were tied to satanism.  Records were being played backwards to listen for subliminal messages.  Christian parents weren't allowing kids to go to concerts because they felt for sure drugs and alcohol would be found there.

 

It was easy to blame music.  It was easy to do so because it was at the forefront of the lives of teenagers.  Realistically speaking, a large percentage of parents of teenagers had listened to the equivelant of that kind of music back in the 60s and 70s.  They went to the concerts.  They listened to the records.  They had the posters of Led Zeppelin, The Grateful Dead, The Doors, and Jimi Hendrix on their bedroom walls.  Eventually the music changed and so did their lives.  Many found religion.  When they did, these religious people -- the same people who used to listen to hardcore rock and roll -- blamed the first thing they could think of: Music.

 

To blame music is a scapegoat.  It makes sense to a point, but it's a lame excuse.  I say that because teenagers don't become rebellious simply because of what they hear on the radio.  There's more to it than that.  I'll list some examples...

 

Tamerlan Tsarnaev (26) and his brother, Dzhokhar Tsarnaev (19) -- Set off bombs at the Boston Marathon which killed 3 and injured more than 170 others on April 15, 2013.

 

Adam Lanza (20) -- Shot and killed 20 small children and 5 adults at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut on December 14, 2012.  Before taking their lives and then his own, he shot and killed his mother, Nancy.

 

Jacob Tyler Roberts (22) -- Shot several people and killing 2 at Clackamas Towne Center outside of Portland, Oregon on December 12, 2012.

 

James Holmes (25) -- Shot and killed 12 people and wounded at least 58 others at a movie theater in Aurora, Colorado on July 20, 2012.

 

Besides setting off bombs and injuring and killing people, what do these five have in common?  They're young men.  Look at their ages: 19-26.  A few days ago I thought about that and I was suddenly struck by a moment of odd silence deep in my soul.  The feeling I had was odd and somewhat unknown to me, as though an unseen force had overcome me and insisted I remain still.  I did, and the feeling was quite uncomfortable.

 

Music wasn't to blame for what these young men did.  It might not have helped, but it certainly wasn't the sole source of their decision-making.

 

This mindset -- not just of killing, but of accusing others, being prideful, wanting to do harm, being arrogant, violent and loud -- goes back a long way, even to biblical times.  When teachers of the law and Pharisees brought forth a woman caught in adultery to Jesus, they wanted him to let them stone her to death.  But Jesus suggested those free of sin be the first to cast a stone at her.  Knowing there was no such individual, the crowd started to disperse, "the older ones first" (John 8:9).  If the older ones left first, then the younger ones were among the last to leave.  Why was that?  Because the younger the man is, the more rigid, stouthearted and stubborn he tends to be.

 

It goes back further than that, even as far back as to the first sons ever born: Cain and Abel.  You know the story.  Cain killed his brother, Abel.  Why?  Because Abel was favored by God more than Cain.  Something to note, however, just as a bit of sidetrail: When God addressed Cain, He told him, "Listen! Your brother's blood cries out to me from the ground" (Genesis 4:10).  Take that into consideration for a moment.  Of all the innocent blood shed throughout all generations, that's a lot of crying God hears.  Just something to think about.

 

Murders happened back then.  Innocent lives were taken.  And music was not to blame.

 

I must ask: When it came to Tamerlan, Dzhokhar, Adam, Jacob and James, what was missing during their upbringing?  Christian or otherwise, I have a feeling there was a lack of spirituality.  Perhaps a mother or father was not a permanent figure in their lives.  There might have been physical, mental, emotional, or sexual abuse.  Discipline either failed or didn't happen at all.  Respect was a commodity unattainable, out of reach.

 

Where light ceases to exist, darkness thrives.  These young men obviously thrived along with it.

 

If there's a parental figure missing in a family, the other parent must become stronger or find someone to fill the void.  I'll go further to say that sometimes, many times, parents are around, but only physically.  To men, I will say this: Any male can get a female pregnant, but it takes a man to be a father.

 

If a young man or woman isn't accepted by his or her parents, that person will seek acceptance somewhere else, even if it means being accepted by a gang.

 

Webster's dictionary defines abuse as being "a corrupt practice or custom; improper or excessive use or treatment; a deceitful act; language that condemns or vilifies usually unjustly, intemperately, and angrily; physical maltreatment."  I'll make myself absolutely clear: Abuse doesn't belong in any relationship, any time, nor any place.  If you are having problems, seek help immediately.  Don't hide it.  Don't pretend it doesn't happen.  Don't think of it as "just a phase."  You're better than that. 

 

When I was younger, I got spanked.  And I deserved it!  Sometimes my mum would spank me with whatever was closest.  We had a weeping willow tree in the yard and when I got into trouble she told me to go get a switch.  The first time I found the smallest switch I get my hands on.  Notice I said "the first time."  Yes.  She came back with a branch!  When we lived on a farm, there was a woodshed.  I was taken to that woodshed plenty of times.  I know some people don't believe in spanking their children.  Hey, if the children grows up fine without it, great.  What I mean to say is there are too many parents who don't even attempt to ponder the idea as to whether or not they should discipline their children.  Spanking worked for me, and I turned out to be a pretty decent gentleman overall.

 

Whether we're parents or grandparents or aunts or uncles or none of the above, we can't simply be silent or non-participants when it comes to the positive nurturing of young people.  Yes, we should know our boundaries (and there should be some and they should be defined).  But to turn a blind eye to a situation that we know just shouldn't be happening, I must say that's unacceptable.  To not do something is just as bad as letting it go on happening.

 

When I was married and my wife's three children from a previous husband of hers were being abused both physically and emotionally by their father, we intervened and removed them from their home.  We had little room for them, but it was better to have them living under our roof than under his.

 

Some quotes to think upon...

 

"I think that saving a little child and bringing him to his own, is a derned sight better business than loafing around the throne." -- John Hay (Little Breeches)

 

"It is a wise child that knows his own father." -- Homer (Odyssey)

 

"Spare the rod and spoil the child." -- English Proverb

 

"The childhood shows the man, as morning shows the day." -- Milton (Paradise Regained)

 

"A wise son maketh a glad father." -- Proverbs 10:1

 

"Train up a child in the way he should go; and when he is old he will not depart from it." -- Proverbs 22:6

 

"It is a wise father that knows his own child." -- Shakespeare (Merchant of Venice)

 

"The best way to make children good is to make them happy." -- Wilde

 

And, in closing...

 

"Children have neither past nor future; and that which seldom happens to us, they rejoice in the present." -- La Bruyere

 

My friend, it's my true belief that there aren't enough children rejoicing in the present.  That breaks my heart.  The sound of children laughing... isn't that a good thing to hear?  To see a child stick up for his parents, for his siblings, or even for himself... doesn't that make you feel good?  Children should be growing up to be positive role models, but they need positive role models in their lives right now in order to become positive role models in the future.

 

Until next time...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



Mary's Story: True Sincerity of the Truly Forgiven

     Mary. A sinful woman set up, mistreated, and accused. Moments later she would be defended by Jesus, pardoned, and forgiven.

     Days after the incident that could have cost her her life, she heard of where Jesus was, walked into the house of people she might not have known, knelt at His feet, and, out of extreme gratitude and thankfulness, washed His feet with a mixture of expensive perfume and her own tears.

John 12:1-8 (NIV)

1                  Six days before the Passover, Jesus arrived in Bethany, where Lazarus lived, whom Jesus had raised from the dead.

2                 Here a dinner was given in Jesus’ honor.  Martha served, while Lazarus was among those reclining at the table with him.

3                 Then Mary took about a pint of pure nard, and expensive perfume; she poured it on Jesus’ feet and wiped his feet with her hair.  And the house was filled with the fragrance of the perfume.

4                 But one of his disciples, Judas Iscariot, who was later to betray him, objected.

5                 “Why wasn’t this perfume sold and the money given to the poor?  It was worth a year’s wages.”

6                 He did not say this because he cared about the poor but because he was a thief; as keeper of the money bag, he used to help himself to what was put into it.

7                 “Leave her alone,” Jesus replied.  “It was intended, that she should save this perfume for the day of my burial.

8                “You will always have the poor among you, but you will not always have me.”

     Jesus appreciated the woman’s beautiful, extravagant gift because it showed her sensitivity to Him as He faced the cross.  His disciples seemed to have had good intentions but lacked sensitivity.

     In Luke 7:44-47, Jesus said of Mary, “she wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair… this woman, from the time I entered, has not stopped kissing my feet… she has poured perfume on my feet… I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven – for she loved much.”

     The woman, Mary, was thought throughout town to have been “a woman who had lived a sinful life.”  It is believed that Mary was the woman supposedly caught in the act of adultery and of whom the teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought to Jesus in hopes to question Jesus and trap Him so that they could accuse Him.  They used Scripture as their basis, saying, “In the Law, Moses commanded us to stone such women.  What do you say?”  They were referring to what we know as the book of Leviticus 20:10, “If a man commits adultery with another man’s wife – with the wife of his neighbor – both the adulterer and the adulteress must be put to death.”  It’s interesting to note, however, that though the teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought forth the woman, they did not bring forth the man.  That leads us to think that the whole scenario was a set-up, as though the purpose behind the accusations were two-fold: one, they were hoping to rid the town of such a sinful woman, and two, they were wanting to catch Jesus in a trap and hopefully have a sound basis for accusing Him.  That plan could have worked because there were several witnesses to back up their claim.  But Jesus, true to form, responded with, “If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.”  His response stunned both Mary and the accusers.  Mary was stunned because she thought for sure her accusers would start throwing stones.  But it stunned the accusers because they knew Jesus was right.  All of them were sinners and they knew it.

      Jesus asked her, “Where are your accusers?  Did anyone condemn you?”  And she, certainly surprised and not knowing this was going to be the end result, with the upmost thankful heart, told Him, “No.  No one has condemned me.”  And Jesus told her, “I don’t condemn you either.”  Jesus was right in telling her that.  He was reminding her then the same thing He is reminding us even today what He told us before He even met Mary when He said, “God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.” (John 3:17)  Jesus saved Mary.  Then He told her, “Go now and leave your life of sin.”  And she must have.  Because here she was now at the feet of Jesus… at the feet of the One who saved her life.

     I want to take a brief segue to remind us that Jesus still does this today.  In the presence of many who accuse us, Jesus, our great Defender, addresses our accusers, our enemy, and those of the dark forces unknown to the doubtful heart and unseen to the blinded eye.

     We don’t know how many days passed between the incident where she was accused and when she knelt at the feet of Jesus.  Could have been a few days, could have been a month, no one really knows for sure.  During all that time the scenario of her accusers grabbing her, hauling her through the street, bringing her to a man she probably didn’t know or perhaps had never seen before… the voice of this individual addressing her accusers and defending her… the sound of stones dropping to the ground one by one, stones meant to bruise and break her body… the words of this incredible man telling her to leave her life of sin… played over and over in her mind.  We don’t know how many days she cried.  It’s fair to assume she cried because she was grieving of having lived such a sinful life.  She knew what she had done.  She knew it wasn’t right.  It was her job.   It was how she earned a living.  Nothing is mentioned of her parents or relatives, so she was probably living the life of a prostitute for many years, perhaps since she was a young girl.  Remember: she had a lot of money.  The perfume she poured on the feet of Jesus cost about as much money as one would normally make in a year.  It’s also fair to assume she cried because she was relieved and thankful.  So thankful, in fact, that the money she saved up – money that could have helped her live a better, more respectable life elsewhere where nobody knew her – was spent on the most expensive, most aromatic perfume money could buy anywhere.   She didn’t buy it for herself.  She bought it as a thank offering, a type of payment for the man who saved her life. 

     Why perfume, though?  Expensive or not, why perfume?  Wasn’t a heart-felt, “Thank You,” enough?  Why not just give Jesus the money instead of spending it on an extremely expensive alabaster jar of perfume?  You see, upon first learning of this story, we could have asked those questions.  We’d be right to ask them.  Jesus was asked, “Why wasn’t this perfume sold and the money given to the poor?”  It’s normal not to understand.  But Jesus knew.  Mary was simply expressing her thankfulness in the best way she knew how.  And Jesus knew why she was doing it.

     Consider this song by Ce Cey Winans...

·         “Alabaster Box” – Ce Ce Winans 

The room grew still as she made her way to Jesus
She stumbles through the tears that made her blind
She felt such pain, some spoke in anger
Heard folks whisper, “There's no place here for her kind.”
Still on she came through the shame that flushed her face
Until at last, she knelt before his feet
And though she spoke no words, everything she said was heard
As she poured her love for the Master from her box of alabaster

(Refrain)
And I've come to pour my praise on Him
Like oil from Mary's alabaster box
Don't be angry if I wash his feet with my tears and I dry them with my hair
You weren't there the night He found me, you did not feel what I felt when he

     wrapped His love all around me
And you don't know the cost of the oil in my alabaster box

I can't forget the way life used to be
I was a prisoner to the sin that had me bound
And I spent my days, poured my life without measure
Into a little treasure box I'd thought I'd found
Until the day when Jesus came to me and healed my soul with the wonder of His  

                 touch
             So now I'm giving back to Him all the praise He's worthy of
             I've been forgiven, and that's why I love Him so much

     In everyday life, we have our accusers including “the accuser of the brethren” (Revelation 12:10).  In everyday life, we have people who are disgusted with us and talk about us whether they know we hear them or not.  In everyday life, we have those who would like to be rid of us even if it means our death.  But in everyday life we have our Defender who speaks on our behalf.  In everyday life, we have the One who doesn’t point His finger at us in a judgmental manner, but looks us in the eye, smiles, and accepts us for who we are.  In everyday life, we have the Son of God who encourages each and every one of us to leave the life of sin behind and live a life full of thankfulness, happiness, spiritual-uprightness and blessing to others.  In everyday life, we have Jesus.

     To be thankful is to be well-pleased.  Show me a person who is well-pleased, and I will show you a person who not only naturally displays that pleasure, but shares it with whomever and for whatever reason in everyday life.   For that is the life of true sincerity of the truly forgiven.